Good morning! Today I am holding my nose and voting:
—For Domenic Recchia, the Democratic Congressional candidate. Mr. Recchia is an embarrassment on foreign policy and couldn’t name the committees he would want to serve on if elected. How bad is the Republican candidate? Well, he’s an incumbent in Albany, so obviously he’s pretty bad, but even in that fraternity he distinguishes himself by being under indictment on charges of underpaying his own low-wage workers (rather than simply campaigning for lower wages for everyone, as is his right as a Republican), and last year he threatened to throw a New York 1 reporter off a balcony live on the air. His excuse, look it up, was “I was Italian at the time.” Vote Recchia, who is also Italian and has never tried to sell a green card to a foreign supporter at a fundraiser.
—[vomiting noise] but I’m voting Green Party for both Governor and lieutenant governor—that would be basically a pair of protest votes against Andrew Cuomo, also a hilariously corrupt shill who hasn’t quite decided whether or not he’ll approve the fracking legislation he’s going to approve immediately after the election, and Kathy Hochul, the gun nut who hates foreigners. Rob Astorino is much worse, in the exact same direction and without any gestures at shame or personal conflict over setting the environment on fire. So I’m voting for Howie Hawkins and Brian P. Jones. You would be totally within your rights to disagree with me here, I just can’t stomach it.
—Thomas DiNapoli, who’s still running as a reformer. Don’t reform too hard, Tom, or you’ll get in the way of the Governor!
—I’m actually going to vote for a Republican for Attorney General: John Cahill. Eric T. Schneiderman, his opponent, has taken on Donald Trump and Airbnb, which I think is great. He’s also a serious flunky for Albany and helped Cuomo dismantle the commission that was investigating him, which is not great. I’ve scoured Cahill’s material for any hint of law-and-order conservatism and can’t find any; maybe he’ll tear off his face to reveal horns and a Tough on Crime stance after he gets elected, but he seems legit to me and I REALLY didn’t want to vote for him. Vote Cahill.
—Wavny Toussaint, Kathy J. King, Lara J. Genovesi, Kevin. R Bryant, Sr. for judge. Cutting out Evelyn J. Laporte, the fourth Dem candidate because she appears to be part of the child molester scandal that unseated Joe Hynes last year.
—Joy F. Campanelli for judge. Martusciello is a joke.
—James T. Kemmerer for State Senate.
—Marybeth Melendez, Assembly
—NO on Proposal one. This was the easiest choice. Mandatory gerrymandering? Thank you, I’ll pass.
—YES on Proposal two.
—YES on Proposal three. We have universal pre-K, now we have to pay for it. Through bonds, though! So it could be worse. And likely will be.
GRAPHOMANIA 